I'm cold!

Brrr.  It's chilly today.  I'm wearing shorts, a sleeveless shirt, and a sweatshirt. 

I need to go shopping.  For clothing.  Again. 

I hate clothes shopping, it's depressing.  Nothing ever fits right.  I'm 5' 1+", and so pants are always too long.  And I've NEVER been shaped right, anyway, pants big enough for my waist are too big in the legs and butt.  Oh, I sometimes find pants I like at KMART, so of course that's next store to close!!!  Oh, well.  Whining again, sorry... trying to limit the whining, so poke me if you catch me at it!

But the change of season sets me to needing more. Shoes, boots, jackets. Warmer blankets (I put a fleece blanket on my bed last night, thank you to whoever it was that gave that to us!)  Need to continue adding to our list of things to replace.

In the meantime, progress on the house is encouraging!  The foundation looks great.  We will take the possessions we've collected while here in Gardiner. I will miss being here - it's been wonderful to have a whole house, space to be together when we want, and separate when we want.  We've had room to collect things and begin the recovery process. 

But as I think of moving in, my stomach hurts.  Anticipation, apprehension, trepidation... We will have movers do the physical work of transporting things.  But then we'll be in the new house.  A friend was telling me about his mother grieving his father's death, and that she is trying to find the new normal. That's what we're looking at - needing to creating the new normal.  As long as we're here in Gardiner, I know it's temporary...

Once we move into the new house, that's it. We will need to adjust, settle in, and be there. I know it will be amazing. I won't get up in the morning to a kitchen that's 58 degrees and think about how to insulate better!  But I also won't come down to the cast iron plaques on the wall that came from my grandparents house.  I won't use the Revereware pans that my mother and I burned popcorn in, before she got her new set and gave those to her mother, which then came to me when she passed away.  When we move it, it will look like anybody's house.  Like a magazine house.  Generic.  I might have to do some of those Paint Nights so I can have artwork to hang!  (Nooooo!!!!!!!!!!!)

So there's excitement - and dread.  Happy, and sad.  I'm looking forward to decorating, to making it our own.  I know we'll create new stories there.. and I'm counting on all of you to come visit, and help us make new memories!  :)